Sunday, January 16, 2005
Death is a very strange thing.
It waits for us, menacing and ghastly, threatening us with entire disruption; tears and sorrow, anguish and despair. It has ever been associated with all things bad. Poison and murder and hell.
Yet some have commented on it's sweetness, lamented on it's comfort... Death is not always a bad thing. It takes away suffering, removes hurt and relieves pain. True, those things seem then allocated to the lost one's beloveds yet such is only temporary, compared to the everlasting kindness of dreamless sleep; or that of reconciliation with one's God and the beauty and wonder that awaits them thereafter.
Death is confusing, mystifying and enigmatic.
It poses as a ominous stranger, yet gives joy and respite like one's dearest friend. Death is the one thing that knows us all (i'm being very secular here) yet seems the one which most do fear.
Perhaps it is not the fear of Death itself which moves us, but that of the unknown. We fear death because it brings images of unwonted horror, or perhaps visions of pleasure, but the fear is of the uncertainty, of the scariness of going towards an unknown destination with no control over it whatsoever. It is always so easy to be pulled into despair by awful visions, while our suspisions and untrustful (deceitful) nature makes us wary of the good. Those weary from sin fear condemnation, while those pious of belief fear a sundering of truth.
Through all this we put ourselves, deliberately ignorant most times of the imminence of death, of it's constant presence and subtle power. The memorial service held today in light of my grand-uncle's recent death not only brought out tears and companionable grief, but also a forced reminder of life's transience. While adults shed tears as we sang and paid tribute to his memory, the aftermath was so much forced joviality, as even I find myself melancholic of the shortness of life and the certainty of death.
Though i shed tears of mourning and remembrance lost, i cannot say that i truly grieved for my granduncle. Rather, i grieved for a life lost and feel sorrow for those suffering from having been left behind on this journey they cannot follow. I cried in empathy, knowing that sooner or later, it would be my turn to stand there before some friends and family, sharing a eulogy of my beloved. Then I myself shall be gone, eventually... With others left behind to remember me and go on. I pray God shall ever be with us and show mercy in allowing our family more time together in His love.
Amen.
10:11 PM