Saturday, December 13, 2003
arghz.......... i miss my best friend.......... i miss li.
i have so many things to tell her and so much stuff to do with her, i can't wait for her to come back from NZ!! when i left, the first person i called was her n she wasn't there anymore. when i came back today she was also the first person i called and she's still not back yet! *woooorryyyyy* comebackcomebackcomebackcomebackcomeback!! i miss her incessant chatter and talking to her about everything and telling her about anything... siiiiighhh...
Oh well. If i'm feeling this way, i can only imagine the torture fi's going thru now :p lol~
and i miss ssc.
and gandhi.
and obs.
home.
:p
9:43 PM
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erpz..... this could almost be true~
lol.
9:38 PM
heyheyHEY~!!!! :D my last post was almost a month ago, i realise =p haha, i've been busy... what with the silly Spaper camp, then obs, then korea................. :) this is one of the most fulfilling holidays i've EVER had!!! For one thing, all the activities i've been on have left me with little time to laze around the house n become a big fat bum (or should i say, bigger n fatter bum...? ;p lol)
i've been running around soo much that i haven't even had the time to savour the blessings that God has given me.. all of which i've fully come to appreciate during the 9 days spent in Pulau Ubin and the challenges thrown at us. Particularly the solo day&nite. It really pushed me to examine myself in an utterly different light; discovering musty hidey-holes within the outer shell of my being that i've never taken the time to visit. Hm.
As the 9days of OBS is really much too much for me to pen (type) down, i'll summarise it in that it was an experience i'd NEVER forget. Never. =P And for those who've been to the 5day obs trip before, the nine day one is totally beyond what u get for the five. Trust me, i was rudely jolted far out of my initial comfort zone, having believe the nine day trip to be simply an extended version of the five :p haha, it was and it was not. More the not than the yea ;) In the first and second day, we were like: 'ok hang in there, just one week more to go~'. After which we were kept waaayyy too busy to even think about how many more days we'd have before being allowed back to mainland Singapore :p first came the land ex, and with it, the solo. During the day of the solo, i did a lot of stoning, reflecting and writing [oh yeah, i have an actual written journal now so i think my days of blogging may be numbered :p]... And as dusk fell, i became really afraid. Forcing myself not to cry, i prayed.. and prayed and prayed... Trembling, i wished wholeheartedly that i could go home. Immediately. Or at worst, the next day. I missed home SO MUCH that i ached with longing and pain... All i wanted to do was go home and hug each and every one of my family. And tell them i love them. Oh to have my mother's shoulder to cry on, my father's bear-like embrace, my sister's words of comfort, my brother's reluctance to show open affection and my grandparents' all-giving love... At that time, i would have given up anything to have all these. Even were i to die right after that, i would die happy and willingly, for that was all i wanted. I found, alone in the forest but for the hand of God around me, that all that mattered in the end was my family. And that was truely ALL that mattered. Revelations. :p
So after the land ex, came the sea ex, where i definitely felt more at home :) *grinne* But even that had it's own challenges for me, when we had to wake up at 4am to start paddling at 5.30am so we could meet our destination for the day... That was really aWeSomE~! We were paddling in the pitch black [and i lost my lovely waterproof adidas hat!!! *sobs*] and we went all the way down to the causeway just for the satisfaction of touching it and completing a goal :) :) In the end, we reached our campsite at 7pm, having travelled the entire day with the currents against us, the sun beating down upon us and only a half an hour lunch break on a beach! whew... that was absolutely amazing and i sincerely take my hat off to those who have never kayaked before. I feel that the only thing that enabled me to reach Changi without flagging was the water experience i've gained thru ssc this year as well as the indomitable spirit of my partner, sya =) =) *gives a big round of applause for 904* we deserve it!! ;)
So all i can say about this 9day obs course is that everyone ought to undergo it!
It is a (to be cliche) truely unforgettable experience!! It makes you set goals for yourself, teaches you how to work with your watch and shows you just how invaluable and indispensible friends are through multiple levels of challenges all set with different aims... But the ultimate challenge is the challenge to face yourself. Throughout these 9 days, all of us who went would have come home with different memories, different friendships etc; but the largest difference would have been IN us. OBS gives you a rare chance to see for yourself who you really are when it comes down to it, and to judge yourself without resentment and, most importantly, a chance to change yourself. And this is what all of us needs... A mirror to our souls and a discerning mind, that we may critically view the flaws within ourselves so as to be able to change ourselves for the better. For if we do not know what our faults may be, how can we ever hope to rectify them?? :p
Hmm.
I think i've said enough for now... Don't have the stamina to go into my korea trip ;)
Oh and for all who know how much i dislike running and how much i suck at it, here's one way that obs has changed me:
When i came back, i decided to go for the 10km standard chartered mini-marathon which would be the day after the day after we returned from obs (which was friday so the day would be sunday geddit? lol). What inspired me to join this run was the 9km run everyone had to do on the morning of the last day of obs. I never thought i could do it... the max i had ever run was 4km on the treadmill which took me aGeS~! ;p haha. but they told us that that run was a personal challenge, without pressure or stress to meet a time limit or keep up with counterparts... All we had to do was finish it! And i did. So i signed up for the mini (which was fantastic cause i met soooOoo many people before and after the run, it was amazing!! *big gRinZ* the first person i met whom i knew was kim chuan, the sexy obs instructor of eng soon or something, the one they keep asking to strip! hahaha, just when i was 'obs-sick' and longing for a familiar face ;) -smile smile-) aannnnyyyywaaaaayyyyyyyyyyyy.... call it a personal challenge or whatever but did it! i completed 10clique and in LESS time than it took for the 9k run thru rough terrain in ubin =) hehehehehe~ the sense of utter satisfaction and completion and this glow of pride is indescribable unless you've experienced it for yourself. So i urge everyone to set goals for yourselves!! Don't give up before you've tried for i know that we are more than who we think we are!! All you have to do is put your mind to it and where there's a will, there's a way! :)
So just keep going k?? Make like the energizer bunny y'all.... NEVER SAY DIE!!! ;D
9:28 PM